If you’re a parent of a teen who seems to be pulling away, shutting down, arguing more, or just feeling out of reach. you’re not alone.
Many parents tell me, “I just don’t know how to connect with my teen anymore.”
And that disconnection can be painful because behind the frustration and distance, what most parents really want is to feel close to their teen again.
Hi, I’m Daniel Jones, a Licensed Social Worker at Manhattan Teen & Young Adult Psychology. I help parents and teens rebuild connection, even when it feels like that bridge has been burned.
Here are five simple ways you can start reconnecting with your teen.
1. Listen to Understand, Not Fix
When your teen opens up, even just a little, resist the urge to jump into problem-solving.
Instead, say something like, “That sounds really hard,” or “I can see why you’d feel that way.”
Your empathy is what opens the door, not your advice.
2. Spend Time Together Without an Agenda
Go for a drive, grab coffee, or watch a show they love, even if you don’t love it.
Those low-pressure moments create safety and signal: “I enjoy being with you.”
3. Be Curious Instead of Critical
When your teen makes a choice you don’t understand, try asking, “Help me see what you were thinking there.”
Curiosity keeps the conversation open. Criticism shuts it down.
4. Repair Quickly After Conflict
Arguments happen. What matters is how you come back together afterward.
Even a simple, “I didn’t handle that well, can we start over?” shows your teen that relationships can be repaired, and that’s a powerful model for them.
5. Take Care of Yourself Too
Parenting a teen is emotionally demanding.
When you get the right support, whether that’s therapy, community, or rest, you’re modeling emotional regulation for your teen and creating space to respond instead of react.
Rebuilding your connection with your teen doesn’t happen overnight, but it can happen. And you don’t have to do it alone.
If you’d like guidance in strengthening your relationship with your teen, I’d be honored to help. Schedule an appointment today and together, we can create a plan that supports both you and your teen in feeling more confident, connected, and understood.